My Mini Me and Me

My Mini Me and Me
Mackenzie holding a picture of me when I was 3....she is now 3

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Sibling love

Blog hop!!!! This picture is of my half sister Cassidy!! She is 16 years younger then me. Until she came along I had been an only child. Talk about a change! As if that wasn't enough my mother gave my sister up for adoption. Luckily my aunt adopted her.... so now she became my cousin. Ugh. She always grew up knowing I was her sister and never questioned it. However 2 years ago she was told the truth. Now she is happy because she finally understands why I am her sister. I haven't been able to see my sister since October because of Mackenzie's tragedy. I miss her soooooo much. I hope she knows how much I love her!
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Saturday, February 12, 2011

saturday shots

Mackenzie earned a ribbon for gymnastics!!!!! Go baby go
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Thursday, February 10, 2011

Thursday Thoughts

My thought for the week is on the subject of dating.

Ive tried the internet, it brought me Mackenzies dad......then NOTHING

Ive never been a girl to go to a bar to try to meet a thats out.

I have been set up on blind dates.....only once has it lead to a second.

Whats a girl to do when she's sick and tired of being single and is out of options????

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Confessions of a mid 20 year old woman

Blog Hop # 3!

This weeks topic is confessions of ___ age woman. When I first seen this I wasnt sure I would post on it but once reading the other ladies in the group I am ready to go! So here are my lovely confessions!

* I HAVE to sleep in the pitch black.....even as a kid I used to throw blankets over my window so it would be dark enough.

* I LOVE to talk on the phone.....but only really when I am driving. Other then that I'd really prefer a text message.

* I love the stuffed mushrooms at Olive Garden and fried mushrooms! BUT if you give me mushrooms in anything other form you will see me acting like a 5 year old and picking them out during my disction of the meal.

* I used to be terrified of being a single I am kind of glad my daughters father isnt in our lives because that means I dont have to share her!

* I havnt had sex in 16 this point if I had a man IDK if i'd know what to do!

* I always knew my family ( moms side) was crazy, I guess I never realized exactly how crazy they really were until this past year.

* I CANNOT fall asleep if the closet doors are open.....this is a recent thing thanks to my lovely counsin. IDK i guess I feel like they are going to attack me. And I must say this is weird beacuse I sleep in the pitch black!

* I have made alot of mistakes in my early 20s and if I could take them back I sure would. The biggest I made was ruining a friendship with my best friend.....

* If you look at my room you would see disorganized chaos, but at work im actually pretty organized.

* Lastly.....when did I become a mid 20's woman! I mean geeze I will be 26 in 2 months.....that kinda freaks me out

Well there are some of my confessions! What are yours? Check out my friend Andrea
who is hosting this week to check out more ladies confessions!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Saturday Shots

I took this picture last week and have been waiting for a chance to post it I decided to do a ** Saturday Shots** post. I just love it....I know I'm a weird mom but she looked so damn cute in her panties searching for something to wear.So not 3

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Thursday thoughts:

Todays thought is why do people do stuff just because they think its whats other people want them to do?

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Monday Moments

Woohoo I have accomplished 2 of these! I am pretty darn proud of myself! I have started many blogs but have never been able to keep up with them! Anyhow onto the blog!

Today's moment is family

For as long as I can remember my family has always been in two....My moms side and my dads. My parents were of course married and lived oh so very happily......NOT. Until I was 3 when they got a divorce. Ever since then I have had two families. I have always had two of everything it seemed. Birthdays, Christmas's, and of course Thanksgivings.

I wish I had pictures in my computer to show you all of the people I call my family because they are some WONDERFUL people. However I do no have all of those pictures and yes this makes me sad.

My dad was a single father who did work alot. He was/is a great man. I appreciate everything he has ever done for me. He always gave me the biggest and best of everything. He was my number one guy! I however only got to see him on his holidays and weekends until I was in middle school when I did move with onto other family members

<3 My Grandma and Grandpa Steiner <3 I loved them soooo soooo soooo much. They were of course the best grandparents a girl could ever ask for. I spent ALOT of time with them since they lived just down the street from my mom...for most of my life anyhow. They gave me EVERYTHING I wanted because I was their baby's baby. I mean HELLO how couldn't I get everything I wanted then?? They passed away in 2004...I wish they could have lived to see my daughter...they would have spoiled her to death just like they did me. OH how I miss them. I still sometimes go to their grave site to "visit" them. When I was prego it was the only place that made me feel better.

Now I am going to lump my aunts and uncles in one category here. I have my dad's brother Fred and his sister Julie. They were both very good to me. But it was different. We only all got together on the holidays. I did see my Aunt Julie alot because she ran a daycare and had cancer and I would go with my grandparents to help run the daycare when she had her appointments. I now of days spend alot more time with my Uncle Fred and his wife Becky.

Now to the OTHER side

My mom......lord what to say about her. She has always been out there. She has "tried" to be a good mom i guess. She was an alcholic and has dated many men. She carted me around to bars and even once almost burned the house down....yeah mother of the year right? She wasnt always the best mom which is why I spent so much time at my Grandma and Grandpa Steiners house when I was not with my dad. Now I am not trying to make my mom out to be some horrid person at all so please dont get this wrong but that is the childhood I grew up in. Even as I got older my mom had trouble with her sexuality and went between men and women for years.....she is now married to a man. But also my mother and I have not spoke in over a month. But she is my mother and I somewhere down in the bottom of my heart love her.....

My grandma and Grandpa Wendell- I know I went there as a child but I dont remember it much. I do remember going on what must of been my moms weekends with me or over summer break because I remember waking up my aunts. I also remember my grandma always dragging me off to chruch UGH. I always wanted to stay with Grandpa....he'd let me take a sip of his beer when I opened it and let me watch wrestling! My Grandpa passed away in.......when I was in 5th grade.....whatever year that was. He had cancer and got very very sick and passed. I was very sad. I loved my grandpa and he always let me get away with things and would always bust my cousin who was the same age as me doing the same thing. My grandma is still alive and we used to have WONDERFUL relationship until months ago when she stopped speaking to us after my cousin sexually assaulted my daughter and she took his side. That made me very very very sad because I charished my grandmother more then my mother.

I will do as I did abover and lump my aunts and uncles in the same category again. I have a Uncle Wade whom dosnt speak to us. A Aunt in Florida who dosnt speak to us. My Aunt Brenda who adopted my sister and has my twin cousins whom used to be very close to us and again stopped speaking to us for said reasons above. My Aunt Jennifer who I was probally the closest to out of everyone. However her son was the one to do the sexual assault to my daughter and it ruined our relationship.....

Now my wish:

My wish is Mackenzie would have a great family experience. However.....she has never met her father....his fault of course because he has had the chance to meet her. And now since she has had something sooo awful happen to her she has had HALF of her family taken from her. My wish is she is a strong enough little girl and she has enough people who love her being friends and my dads side of the family that she will have a BIG family in us and get to know what it is like to be a close family.

* sorry this is long and probally pointless to all of you